Good Living, Good Life: Single White Female

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Hi My Doves,

You know how there is always a wave of friends that get engaged and married and have babies all at the same time. It’s just like if there is a city wide blackout and nine months to the day the hospitals maternity wards are more grid locked then the freeway on a Monday morning – So I was talking to a single friend the other day and this is happening in her life at the moment and I’ve been there too ( not the blackout, the engagement and weddings) – that can be the worst time for a single girl because it makes you re-evaluate your relationship status. Even a single girl who 99% of the time is happy with her single status – can feel the ground shake beneath her and question her choices.

I am more than aware of the reasons I am single. It starts off with: I choose to be. The way I fall in love is completely and blindly. I am only too aware that when I fall in love (which only is once in every five years, if I am truthful) everything else falls be the waist side – including seeing the world and writing a novel. I know there are things I need to do first, thing I need to accomplish before I will be a hundred and ten per cent happy in that relationship – right now I can opening and whole heartily say ‘I am too selfish for a relationship’

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But as I have said when that wave of friends are getting engaged and married and have babies, a girl can feel lonely or feel like she’s made the wrong choice.

I think it’s our way of thinking that needs to change about the dreaded ‘single’ status. I hate the thought of turning into an ‘Aunt March’ character – in ‘Little Women’ old, crotchety and difficult. Rotting away in a big old house with nothing but a yappy dog and forcing a companion to come see me. I hate that thought…………..but I love the thought of being a Stevie Nicks type character that relish the joys of aunthood. Be that cool Rock n Roll aunt with the amazing wardrobe that my niece will beg me to wear (it’s already started. When I brought my Nicole Richie kimonos and they got delivered my niece’s first words were ‘Pretty,they for me?’ She was three at the time)

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It’s okay to have those moments or doubt – question if you are on the right path for you and your dreams – if at the end of the day or in a few days’ time you go back to your single loving self – that is fantastic  but if you think that yes, you want a relationship. That’s great too – go out on a date – test out a few guys – because there is nothing wrong with that either.

 

I love being single – I will cop to dancing around the house to Lady Gaga, Kelly Clarkson or belting out Cher at the top of my lungs because there is no one else there and I enjoy it. I like that I can sleep diagonal in my queen size bed and spend the whole weekend catching up on The Walking Dead because I haven’t seen it since The governor showed up with a big giant tank  – I can do that and not feel guilty. I however will not cop to being like Bridget Jones – in any way shape or form – My underwear is a secret I keep with Victoria, not a ships sale I get from Ms Mable. ( okay fine, My booze intake maybe the same as Bridget’s but I will never date a guy that can’t throw a decent punch)

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There is no wrong avenue to finding happiness, as long as you’re not doing harm to yourself or other because we all deserve happiness – single or not

xxLayla

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